Not the Worst

I feel so trapped
all the time.
I’m falling short
of the line.
It can’t be his fault;
he treats me well.
He can’t be the reason
this feels like hell.
He’s never raised a hand
or even voice.
These things I gave up,
weren’t they my choice?
I have to be happy.
They tell me I should.
But given the chance,
would I run if I could?
We’re the perfect couple,
everyone tells me so.
But I’ve lost my voice.
God, where did it go?
I know that at times
this feels like a curse,
but I’ll be okay,
surely others have it worse.

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Key to My Heart

I once had
the key to my heart,
but then I gave it away.
I thought that he
would treasure it,
instead he threw it away.
I never thought
I’d see it again.
I believed
it disappeared.
So when you fell
in love with me,
and I told you of my fears
I never expected
for you to find
my key and hold it dear.

If I’d Never Known

If I’d never known your touch,
never felt your kiss,
never felt your arms
wrapped around my hips.
I’d never know your passion,
wouldn’t know your love,
wouldn’t know the ache
when my heart wasn’t enough.
I wish I didn’t know
when I’m settled for the night
and my body can’t get passed
the ache I feel inside,
but in the light of day
when I see you pass me by
I’m glad I got to know
your love coaster ride.

If I Had Known

If I had known
that this is how
our friendship would end,
I would never
have given you
the power to hurt me,
I would have stayed guarded.
If this is how
it was always going to be,
I wouldn’t have
handed you the knife,
I wouldn’t have
let you see me bleed.

Friends

When you’ve lost yourself
and you don’t know how to be found,
there are those friends who stick by you
when your world is tumbling down,
who never give up on you
when you’ve given up on yourself,
bring you out of your shell
when you’d go on hiding on a shelf.

Forsaken Heroes

Little hero
standing tall,
go back home
before you fall.
What they are is disease released,
spreading far to feed the beast.
On your shoulders
they’ll place the world
until you collapse
replaced with boys and girls.
They fill your head with pretty lies
before they send you off to die.
You’ll be a hero
is often said.
What good’s the praise
if you’re already dead?

Forever Changed

There’s no going back
when I step off this path.
If I take your hand
and choose to be yours,
I can’t go back
to who I was before.
If one day you choose
to break my heart
and we go our separate ways,
I won’t just change back
to who I was
before you,
before us,
before I was swept away.
The me of now
will no longer exist.
If I choose
to take your hand,
I’ll be
forever changed.

Farewell 26

Farewell 26

You served me well
it travels far
and as I searched within.
You gave me courage
to try new things
with varying results.
You brought me closer
to the things I love
almost like
I was in a dream.
I’ll never forget
all that we’ve been through
even though
we now part ways.
So long, farewell
you’ve served me well,
but now I’m off to ’17.

Drifting

Drifting from reality,
the pastime keeps me free
but as I dive into
my fantasies
I lose my grip
on sanity.
What once made sense
has now been lost
as the common world
falls away.
I live my life
in fantasy
falling deeper in
this land,
but worry not
they know me here
and they all like to play.